Which is kinda funny, because for years we’ve done this thing with our friends on New Year’s Eve where we share our resolutions and invent silly ones for each other. It’s fun and it’s become something of a tradition.
I even did it myself for years, quite seriously, sitting down and writing a carefully thought-out list and adding my signature at the bottom to make it all official. Except that by February, the list had found its way to the junk drawer, and by March it was stuck somewhere in the filing cabinet, which we all know means it will Never Be Seen Again.
Call me cynical, but the one thing this has taught me is that New Year’s Resolutions don’t work.
We’re halfway through January. Let’s be honest. How many of you are still going gung-ho with those optimistic resolutions you wrote with fireworks shining in your eyes and a brand-new untouched year stretching ahead of you?
Looking back at previous years – how many of those resolutions lasted past January? Past Easter? Or (heaven help us) right to the end of the year?
Don’t get me wrong… I’m all for goal-setting and planning to succeed. I’m not trying to rain on your 2015 parade. It’s just that I think there’s one major problem with resolutions. You could call it a fatal flaw.
It’s this:
There are too many of them.
It goes like this. You look at your life in its current state and think about everything you don’t like and want to change. Then you get your pen and paper and make a massive list of all the things you need to do to reach your supposed ideal state of perfection over the next twelve months. The list looks like this:
Lose weight.
Exercise five times a week.
Run a half-marathon.
Eat salads for lunch every day.
Give up wine.
Give up chocolate.
Write a book.
Learn to speak French.
Be a better mum.
Be a better wife.
Take up volunteer work.
Give up TV.
De-clutter the entire house.
Spend more time with friends.
Rise at 5am daily to have Quiet Time before kids wake up.
Read the entire Bible in one year.
Never be late to anything ever again.
…. and on and on it goes. Of course, a hundred different people will come up with a hundred different lists, but you know what your list looks like, don’t you? We’ve all written one.
It’s like trying to knock a pebble off a fence using a spray bottle on the mist setting. Your energy is flying off in a thousand different directions just like those miniscule droplets of water. The pebble might get damp, but it’s never gonna budge. What you need to do is tighten the nozzle. Let it rip with one single, focussed, powerful jet of water. And bit by bit, as you continue to squirt that pebble, it will nudge incrementally closer to the edge until finally it falls off.
Okay, so you’ve probably never pictured your life as a pebble on a fence, but you can see what I’m saying, right? All our New Year’s goals and resolutions could be summed up in one mission: A BETTER YOU. But when we try to tackle too many different areas all at once, we diffuse our focus. And our list of resolutions, instead of motivating us, ends up merely documenting our shortcomings. That darn pebble just won’t budge. We get to the end of the year, and we’re just the same as we’ve always been.
I don’t write New Year’s resolutions anymore. I don’t live my life by a list of failures I want to “fix”. I’ve found a better way. And guess what? – I’ve achieved more in the years since I decided to ditch the resolutions than I ever did before. Even better, I’ve grown and transformed as a person.
Want to know my secret?
It’s this: I choose one word for my year. Just one. One word to resonate through my days, weeks, and months. One word to frame my decisions and attitudes.
One word is different from a goal or resolution. Resolutions can be broken. They set you up for failure. One word is about the process of transformation. It sets you up for success.
One word is a mindset. It informs your choices and your daily habits. It’s such a little thing… just a seed, really. But planted into a life, it slowly puts down roots and grows.
A list of resolutions is easily forgotten, but even this scatter-brained mother of three can remember one word.
The One Word philosophy has become an enormous movement. Chances are you’ve heard of it already. You can find out more information direct from the source at the My One Word website. You’ll find a treasury of words chosen by thousands of different people, each word unique to its bearer.
Intentional.
Transform.
Truth.
Grace.
Simplify.
Present.
Brave.
Your word is a gift. I’ve found that when I pray about my word for the year, God gives me a vision of how he wants me to grow. The words he’s given me in the past have been powerful. They’ve given me focus and clarity. Unleashed growth. Led to real, long-term, lasting change.
Because after all, it’s better to do something about one thing than nothing about everything.
I’m excited this year about growing One Word closer to the woman God wants me to be.
So what’s my word? Stay tuned – I’ll be sharing it in my next post. And yes, my One Word for 2015 may just have something to do with my unexplained absence from this blog for the past five weeks. You deserve an explanation, so I’m going to lay it all out and let you know exactly what’s been going on.
Until then, why not think and pray about your word?
Let’s chat: Have you ever chosen One Word for your year before? What do you think of this concept? Is there a word you feel nudged toward?
I love that phrase "it's better to do something…" I was looking for a print or something to pin. Where did it come from?
Wondered were u had been !!! I so relate to what u r saying – great words of wisdom there – I have never chosen a word for the year – but may have just ignited a spark within me to do this .. I will certainly pray fully consider what God wants me to focus on this year so that I can grow as a person, wife , mother , friend …. What a truly interesting thought .. My first thought for a word would be wisdom – being Wise for 2015 – but I will pray some more over this – thank you so much for sharing this .. Sue xx I await yr next post …
I love that phrase "it's better to do something…" I was looking for a print or something to pin. Where did it come from?
Wondered were u had been !!! I so relate to what u r saying – great words of wisdom there – I have never chosen a word for the year – but may have just ignited a spark within me to do this .. I will certainly pray fully consider what God wants me to focus on this year so that I can grow as a person, wife , mother , friend …. What a truly interesting thought .. My first thought for a word would be wisdom – being Wise for 2015 – but I will pray some more over this – thank you so much for sharing this .. Sue xx I await yr next post …
Hi Victoria! The phrase is one I made up. At least…. I think I did! It just popped into my mind like something I surely must have heard before somewhere – but I Googled it and can't find it anywhere else…. looks like I thought of something original! LOL. Just for you, I made it into a pin. What a great idea! Thanks! xoxo
So glad this inspired you to think of your own word, Sue! I love "Wise"! xo
Hi Victoria! The phrase is one I made up. At least…. I think I did! It just popped into my mind like something I surely must have heard before somewhere – but I Googled it and can't find it anywhere else…. looks like I thought of something original! LOL. Just for you, I made it into a pin. What a great idea! Thanks! xoxo
So glad this inspired you to think of your own word, Sue! I love "Wise"! xo
I love it! I'm chuffed that I inspired you to make a pin 🙂 I've had a tough time recently and I've found that there can be a great feeling of achievement in getting something done instead of being overawed at 'everything' that needs doing. I've pinned it to my positivity board @victoriaspace
I love it! I'm chuffed that I inspired you to make a pin 🙂 I've had a tough time recently and I've found that there can be a great feeling of achievement in getting something done instead of being overawed at 'everything' that needs doing. I've pinned it to my positivity board @victoriaspace
So very true, Victoria! #preachingtomyself
So very true, Victoria! #preachingtomyself
I made a list like the one you shared. And guess what? It's not working. So I chose the word purposeful instead. Thanks, friend!
Awesome, Shelly!! I love your word! xo
I made a list like the one you shared. And guess what? It's not working. So I chose the word purposeful instead. Thanks, friend!
Awesome, Shelly!! I love your word! xo
My word for this year is Commit. I love the concept of choosing one word and applying it to every sphere of your life. Karen this a great post and one we need to be reminded of at least once every quarter.
I make yearly goals, not New Year's resolutions because I feel like they have a bad connotation to everyone. The last five or so years, I've worked on my goals most of the year. Some years my goals are definitely silly, and some years they are more serious. But I don't think I will ever give up my yearly goals. I also use Lara Casey's powersheets to help me define my goals and keep up with them and it helps a lot. I've heard a lot about a word for the year, especially from Elise at her blog, enjoyitblog.com. I just can never come up with a word. I'm really glad you've found something that works for you. And that's all that really matters. We just need to find what works for us.
I'm so with you on no more resolutions! This is my first year trying one word. I love the framed Faithful 2014 picture. I'm going to make something like that for my word this year: Health. I'm really excited to focus on one area instead of finding myself depressed by the end of January for not being able to keep my normal disgustingly long list of resolutions.
I gave up on resolutions, too this year. Instead, I did both a word of the year, and I'm doing monthly goals to reflect that word of the year!
My word for this year is Commit. I love the concept of choosing one word and applying it to every sphere of your life. Karen this a great post and one we need to be reminded of at least once every quarter.
Love it, Tayler!! It's so cool to see the trickle-down effect of one word and how it affects those short-term goals. All the best on your journey this year!
Yay, Candace! It makes such a difference!
So true, Ashley! And yes, there is a lot of power in goal-setting too, if it's done well. Sounds like you have a great system in place. Here's to smashing those goals this year!
Thanks, Kimberly. What a great word! xo
I make yearly goals, not New Year's resolutions because I feel like they have a bad connotation to everyone. The last five or so years, I've worked on my goals most of the year. Some years my goals are definitely silly, and some years they are more serious. But I don't think I will ever give up my yearly goals. I also use Lara Casey's powersheets to help me define my goals and keep up with them and it helps a lot. I've heard a lot about a word for the year, especially from Elise at her blog, enjoyitblog.com. I just can never come up with a word. I'm really glad you've found something that works for you. And that's all that really matters. We just need to find what works for us.
I'm so with you on no more resolutions! This is my first year trying one word. I love the framed Faithful 2014 picture. I'm going to make something like that for my word this year: Health. I'm really excited to focus on one area instead of finding myself depressed by the end of January for not being able to keep my normal disgustingly long list of resolutions.
I gave up on resolutions, too this year. Instead, I did both a word of the year, and I'm doing monthly goals to reflect that word of the year!
Love it, Tayler!! It's so cool to see the trickle-down effect of one word and how it affects those short-term goals. All the best on your journey this year!
Yay, Candace! It makes such a difference!
So true, Ashley! And yes, there is a lot of power in goal-setting too, if it's done well. Sounds like you have a great system in place. Here's to smashing those goals this year!
Thanks, Kimberly. What a great word! xo
This year instead of attempting resolutions I looked at and prayed about the lifelong dreams I want to chase after. I'm breaking those major dreams into smaller goals to work on, modify, and grow in all throughout the year and years to come!…. The pebble illustration was awesome by the way!
This year instead of attempting resolutions I looked at and prayed about the lifelong dreams I want to chase after. I'm breaking those major dreams into smaller goals to work on, modify, and grow in all throughout the year and years to come!…. The pebble illustration was awesome by the way!
Brandy, I love that! Using your lifelong dreams as your starting point is such great motivation. I hope this year is everything you dream it will be.
Brandy, I love that! Using your lifelong dreams as your starting point is such great motivation. I hope this year is everything you dream it will be.
Thanks Karen! 🙂
Thanks Karen! 🙂
I think about doing; I plan to do; I make lists to remind me to do. And, then I fail to take that first step to start doing. My motto for the year is, "Do the next right thing by taking the first step." My mom often uses the old phrase that "the road to hell is paved with good intentions." The Phrase Dictionary defines that as meaning "there is no merit in good intentions unless they are acted on." So, I'm praying and asking God if my word for the year is "start."
I think about doing; I plan to do; I make lists to remind me to do. And, then I fail to take that first step to start doing. My motto for the year is, "Do the next right thing by taking the first step." My mom often uses the old phrase that "the road to hell is paved with good intentions." The Phrase Dictionary defines that as meaning "there is no merit in good intentions unless they are acted on." So, I'm praying and asking God if my word for the year is "start."
Awesome, Kaye. I love that word and it sounds just perfect for the area you've been struggling in. And we've all been there – especially us over-thinking, perfectionist types. Sometimes the hardest and best thing is to just DO something. Something done less than perfectly is still better than something not done at all. Bless you this year! xo
Awesome, Kaye. I love that word and it sounds just perfect for the area you've been struggling in. And we've all been there – especially us over-thinking, perfectionist types. Sometimes the hardest and best thing is to just DO something. Something done less than perfectly is still better than something not done at all. Bless you this year! xo